It was the last night Cedar was in the NICU I had just finished feeding and burping him. You’d think the NICU would be a quiet and peaceful place, with sleeping babies. Not at all. It does have sleeping babies but sometimes they cry, their alarms go off for one reason or another, and the nurses all chatter and laugh loudly. It’s a good way to teach a baby to sleep through just about anything.
Anyway, as I held him, I looked away for a second, and when I looked back, his eyes were open and he was looking around. They were the deep, dark blue of a cold ocean. He was taking in what he could as he looked around him, and for me, all the NICU noise disappeared. In that moment when I noticed him noticing things, everything went silent and all I could see was him, seeing me.